Inklings

Blog

  • It’s the Exciting New Game Sensation…

    We’re grateful that our two boys have each other to entertain, but the close quarter conditions wrought by the long winter is taking its toll. What starts out as innocent conversation during playtime will sometimes turn into an all-out argument. Disagreements arise, tempers flare and the kid with the clear disadvantage will often resort to the cowardly game of mockery. It’s the only technique I can think of that not only requires the least amount of skill or wit but is guaranteed to leave the opponent frustrated and defenseless – unless, of course, they wish to lower themselves to fight on equal terms.

    “Mom, he’s mocking me!” will often be met with, “Well, are you mockworthy?” It’s a valid question when you think of it. The only way to defeat a mocker is to give them nothing to mock. That requires the mockee to ignore the mocker. In our boys’ case that’s harder to do than fighting. Eventually they’ll learn how the game is won, but I fear it will be the hard way.

  • The Golden Rule

    Do unto others as you would have done to you. Such a simple phrase to remember but more difficult to live by. The world would truly be a different place if we all could exercise this rule. Too often we put our selfish agendas before others and are quick to complain when we feel wronged in the same way. I wish I could say that I practice the golden rule regularly, but the fact is I fail more often than I care to admit. Ironically enough the faults I find in others are the ones I frequently suffer myself. That simple truth is often humbling enough to make me rethink my actions before doing them.

  • Cubicles

    It’s good that kids have dreams and aspirations. As parents I feel it’s very important to encourage a child to pursue his/her goals. Sometimes their sights are set a bit high and other times… well, not so much. Our seven-year-old expressed a future desire of his just the other day. “Mom, when I get older I want to work in one of those offices where everyone has their own box.” Either he wishes to work in some very large shipping department or he’s referring to a cubicle. Right now it’s funny, but I hope his aspirations evolve into something a little loftier, like maybe a corner office with a nice window view.

  • Salesmanship

    As a parent of school-aged children I see a different side to the ‘salesmanship’ we experienced growing up. At some point or another every child goes through the ‘salesman phase’.

    The (insert organization here) will be conducting a (fundraiser/raffle/lottery) to raise money by selling (insert product here). The child that sells the most (product) will win (a really cheap prize that negates all the hard work the child has done to attain it).

    I understand that kids’ organizations take money to run and I have no problem supporting them but I think these organizations have to understand that not all kids will be salespeople. We have, like many parents, guiltily assumed the role for them because a) it’s safer and less time-consuming than taking them door-to-door and b) our kids aren’t exactly thrilled about selling anything to people they don’t know. Perhaps in doing so we’re cheating them from not learning some valuable life lesson like working hard to accomplish a goal or how to cope with rejection, but I think they’ll experience enough of both when they become teenagers.

  • Headaches

    I seldom get headaches, but when I do they’re bad. A lot of times I can pinpoint the cause of my headache (lack of sleep, dehydration, congestion) so I can remedy it and get on with my life. All in all I consider myself really fortunate. My oldest son and wife are not so lucky. They both suffer from the occasional food-triggered migraine. The worst aspect of their malady is it happens to be a food they’re both very fond of… chocolate. In light of this fact I’ve learned not to complain much when I feel the pressure of a headache coming on.

  • Practical Jokes

    Who doesn’t like a good laugh now and again? Practical joking has always been a creatively effective way to make someone laugh – providing no one gets hurt. A lot depends on who you’re pranking, too. I’ve been the victim of a few practical jokes – some unknowingly (much to the chagrin of the pranksters) – but most of the time I can appreciate the humor of the situation.

    One of the traditions of the building I work in was an initiation of sorts. One of the old wooden signs outside our building was replaced years ago with a more modern metal sign. As a memento of the old sign, one of my former colleagues kept a 2 foot section of a 4×4 post. Whenever a new instructor was hired my former colleague and his cronies would lodge said post under the back tire, just out of sight, of the victim’s vehicle. Around quitting time they would all lag behind and congregate around the windows of the shop garage door that overlook the parking lot. As you can imagine, they had a good hearty laugh watching the poor fellow trying to leave after checking his parking brake repeatedly.

    When my colleague retired, I inherited that post. We’ve since hired some new people in this building… hmmmm. April Fool’s is coming up.

  • Sledding

    They sure don’t make sleds like they used to. I still remember the old Flexible Flyer sled we had growing up. The powder-coated steel runners elevated the treated birch body off the snow high enough to ensure that there was minimal friction to slow you down. Combine this simple engineering with ideally packed snow and you had yourself a sixty inch snow torpedo. That flexible wooden steering plank mounted on the front gave the lead rider little, if any, serious control of a four-person team once they reached terminal velocity. As if this sled wasn’t dangerous enough, I can recall riding it down the middle of our steeply sloped street. Thankfully there wasn’t a lot of traffic.

  • Junk Mail

    Unless you’re expecting something via U.S. Mail, the trip to the mailbox is often a fruitless endeavor. The amount of junk mail that we receive has probably gone down over the past few years, but occasionally we still get that credit card application we never requested or the local coupon package with discounts for products and services we don’t use. Even if you hate getting it, you have to admit that it’s still an effective way for advertisers to get their message out there… before it gets torn in half and thrown away.

  • SUV (Sadly Underutilized Vehicle)

    The cost of petroleum in this country has nearly pushed the once popular full-sized SUV into extinction. My feeble mind never understood the love affair some people had with the huge gas guzzlers (I know my wallet couldn’t). It seemed that the people who would actually need such a vehicle for heavy-duty, off-road hauling of cargo/personnel didn’t own one – but everyone wanted one. Smelling the profits, auto manufacturers began cozying up to the status-seekers who coveted the sleek urbanized versions of their rugged SUV ancestors (remember the Broncos and Blazers of yesteryear?).

    The oil industry and heightened environmental consciousness have brought about the latest evolutionary change in SUV design – the crossover. It’s not exactly the rugged behemoth we associate with the term SUV, but it isn’t the pansy, family mini-van either. It’s the perfect vehicle for pulling out tree stumps while your wife changes the kids’ diapers in the back seat. I have to admit the mini-van part of me just might be interested in this version. Now if I can just convince my wallet.

  • Love Isn’t Cool When You’re a Kid

    You have to appreciate the independence kids develop as they get older. That’s the only way you’ll be able to deal with what seems like heartbreaking rejection. If you’re not there yet, prepare yourself. There will come a day when you drop your ‘baby’ off at school and he/she will all but ignore you. Don’t even think about giving good-bye hugs or kisses or verbal affirmations of such affection – they’d rather be set on fire than to have their friends witness such mushiness.

    Walking into the school to greet your child after school is tolerated but don’t even think about escorting them onto school property in the morning. Bad idea. I’ve found that a drive-by drop-off is preferred. That way they can enter into the no-demonstrative-love-zone of school without too much of their parents’ being exposed. I never understood why kids want to pretend that they were orphans raised in the wild rather than claim two loving parents. I don’t intend to let them off the hook anytime soon. They’ll have to deal with my loving them publicly at the risk of being embarrassed by it.